Communication | INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION | Park University


From Interpersonal Choice Point: Dealing with Jealousy 

Your romantic partner of the last 6 months has recently been showing signs of jealousy with absolutely no cause. This is making you feel uncomfortable and is restricting your enjoying other friends and activities that don’t include your partner. You want to continue this relationship but you want the jealousy to stop.

What are some of the things you might say?

a. Explain that there is no cause for jealousy and hope your partner believes you, and changes.

b. Give an ultimatum–either the jealousy stops or you’re moving on.

c. Say nothing: the jealousy will likely get less and eventually go away.

d. Give up your other friends and activities that don’t include your partner.

e. Other… explain

Response should be based off the three types of jealousy and INCLUDE A QUOTE FROM THE TYPE OF JEALOUSY CHOSEN

 The Types of Jealousy Three types of jealousy are often distinguished: cognitive, emotional, and behavioral (Erber & Erber, 2011):

 • Cognitive jealousy Cognitive jealousy involves your suspicious thinking, worry-ing, and imagining the different scenarios in which your partner may be interested in another person 

 • Emotional jealousy Emotional jealousy involves the feelings you have when you see your partner, say, laughing or talking intimately with a rival, or kissing. Or, perhaps you become jealous if your partner spends too much time on Internet relationships.

 • Behavioral jealousy Behavioral jealousy refers to what you actually do in response to the jealous feelings and emotions, for example, reading your partner’s e-mail, looking on Facebook for incriminating photos, or going through the back seat of the car with the proverbial fine-tooth comb. Sometimes you feel jealousy because of some suspicion that a rival is looking to steal your relationship partner. And so you might conceal your relationship, monopolize your partner’s free time, or avoid situations where rivals might be present—strategies refered to as mate guarding (Buss, 2000; Erber & Erber, 2011). 

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